Media I have consumed...

I read the book "The Ten Year Nap" by Meg Wollitzer. I picked it up for $4 at Borders in the remainder bin, even though it's a fairly new, bestselling book. I gobbled it up. It was the first time I had identified so closely with a book in a long while- it being about 40-something stay at home moms. It was nearly perfect in it's portrayal of the conflict we feel as mothers. (Okay, maybe it was just perfect.) The daily pull of self interest against family interest. As one review put it- who do women owe their allegiance to, themselves? their children? their husbands? their mothers? their friends? The worries of our lives, our children's well-being, our husbands interests, our aging selves- the cutting off from our old selves- before children. What if? You can read the first chapter here.

I have read several articles in The New Yorker which I have already forgotten. But which will return to me in some weird fashion in the middle of a conversation one day. One morning, I absent-mindedly started reading the middle of a short story. I rarely read them- I don't know why- there is no good explanation. I guess when I'm reading the magazine I'm not in a fiction mood. Anyhow- it caught my interest so I turned to the beginning. To my delight it was written by Lorrie Moore. I was introduced to her in college and read a few of her novels. At the time, me being young and starry eyed- they struck me as mean and dark. Now, as my older self, I appreciate her style. Funny- "Childcare" is about a young college girl interviewing for a job as a nanny to a 40-something woman. Coincidence? I think not. The gods are speaking to me. You can read the short story here.

recovery and inspiration

As Barney Frank said last night on The Daily Show, people would rather receive stimulation than recovery, when referring to what to call the "stimulus package."

As I recover from my second surgery I'm trying to take it slow. I'm trying to save myself for the future. Instead of the "I'm young still I can do anything," I have to approach it as "I'm young, but I have to preserve myself by not overdoing it." The last few days have felt stale and I feel like an old stone just sitting, waiting. I've been trying to stimulate my mind. But what I've been doing is consuming like crazy. Not food, it isn't sitting too well as the anesthesia still affects my body. I have read a whole book, watched a lot of amazing movies and read a lot of New Yorker articles and snarky internet news blogs. I've been trying to inspire myself with thoughts of projects, but nothing really grabbed me.

Then this morning as I sat on the side of the tub changing a diaper (we do them standing up now) I glanced up and saw this...

... and inspiration struck.

More Music

I've been greatly anticipating the latest project from Stuart Murdoch- creator of Belle & Sebastian. I fell head over heals with this music a few years back, but just a few years late of their arrival. Somehow I missed the premiere- I think they came out when I was deeply immersed in Duke Ellington. The music is an extension of my beloved Smiths- which I feel was engrained on my DNA through so many nights of listening to The Queen is Dead over and over my year after high school graduation.

Now, Stuart Murdoch has created God Save the Girl, which at the outset seems to simply be Belle & Sebastian sung by girls. But it's a bit more than that. It is the music for a film that Murdoch is creating. The songs tell a story. And I don't understand how he does it, but he channels the mind of a young girl. That young girl that was sitting in my room 20 some years ago, pining, melancholy sometimes- but generally carefree, on the cusp of life-before car payments, before college, before marriage and children. Such a sweet time, but not very recognizable while one is immersed in it.

To get a real feel for the whole project, you can listen to the entire album here.